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Love Poems About Humorous or Humorous Love Poems

Humorous love poems and/or love poems about Humorous. Read, share, and enjoy these Humorous love poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Humorous Poems.

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous, nursery rhyme,

JACK AND JILL RE WRITTEN

Jack and Jill went up the hill With thoughts of making love Jack hadn’t got a condom So cut a finger off Jill’s glove The glove was far too small for him And it didn’t fit his todger Now they are proud parents Of a baby they called Rodger! 1st October 2016 Another poem written after being inspired by Ilene Bauer's poem three blind mic


Poem Details | by arthur vaso |
Categories: art, dark, evil, funny, humorous, internet,

Modern Poetry

Skip ad
poem will resume very soon
wait
pause
turn off ad block
and
ad blocker
get dressed
is not that kind of poem
vote
please favorite me
I am flavor to be
like me
love me
photoshop me
pause for second ad
add ads, subtract ads
multiply wine ads
get more wine
is a long damn add
ok
bought the Mercedes
make love
to words
iPassion
is in
snap snap and chat
latex friendships
hollywood dreams
with amex
I never leave home
there she rests
in the trunk
blood mixed
with that new car smell
everything is modern these days
even my jail cell

Poem Details | by Daniel Turner |
Categories: crush, funny love, humorous, teacher,

Teacher's Pet

As I look back, it all seems funny now
Recalling all those awkward teen age years
I pushed the limits farther than allowed
Supposedly when young, we had no fears

Infatuation caught me with the blues
My heart was swollen by love's gentle sting
It was a crush that only left a bruise
Left by the diamond in her wedding ring

The first day I laid eyes on her, I fell
The lightning bolt she was, that shook my world
And to this day I swear I'd know her smell
Could she have read my mind, she'd likely hurled

I hated school but never missed her class
She said she loved me 'cause I made her laugh


  original poem by Daniel Turner

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous,

LOVE IS BIND

poor puppet dances to the tune of her master - he’s pulling her strings! Jan Allison 9th April 2015 Contest: - Judy Konos Get Your Senryu On ~awarded 1st place~

Poem Details | by Jerry T Curtis |
Categories: food, funny, humorous, nonsense, romance, sexy, silly,

A Fine Flavor between lines

Is it Love
a simple bowl of ice cream
sweating from the heat
cherries on the top
huddled 'round and looking sweet
two little wooden paddles
pretend that they are spoons
as we sit beneath the stars
in the savor of the moon
your lips are all I see
as they caress them with a passion 
the cherries on your tongue
in a delightful playful fashion 
with our eyes intent and focused
in a stare of solemn trust
Is this ice cream truly love
or is it merely cherry lust

Poem Details | by Black Eyed Susan |
Categories: funny, humorous, journey, poems,

Poems for My Alien Abductors: a Ride into Space

I thought I could wow them with poems from earth
Poems of joy and humor, poems extolling it’s worth
So I laid out poems from Michael, Gail, and me
From Andrea, David, Gwen, and Ilene
From PD, Harry, Mandy, and Chris
From Jack, Craig, Cyndi, and Liz…
For I was sure once they read our beautiful works
They would embrace us and love our humanly quirks!
So last night I taped them all over my skin
Knowing they’d find them if they took me again…

When I woke up, they were gone and I had a reply:
“We enjoyed reading those poems last night, 
And thanks for the names of the earthlings too -
We have many more experiments to do!”


2/7/13
For Michael's boomerang...send your poem for a ride contest

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous, love,

I LOVE TO HATE YOU

Just one look at you Tempting me, teasing me, tormenting me I hate the feelings you evoke Greed Desire Lust Just want to hold you, devour you I don’t want to see you go But I can never resist the last chocolate in the box! 9th March 2015 Contest – Love or Hate – Pick a subject - Shadow Hamilton I chose Love as my theme ~awarded 1st place~

Poem Details | by arthur vaso |
Categories: fantasy, fun, funny, holiday, humorous, love,

I Want Peace

I want a piece of chocolate cake
Oh and a delicious piece of cherry pie
I want a piece of that place called Fort Knox
With all those pieces I could afford a lot

I want a piece of that lady over there
In her haute couture she saunters with such flair
I want a piece of the clouds in the sky
I just want it, don't ask me why!

I want some tiny peace of mind
To have some pieces left to be kind
Then I can give you a piece of  Art
A piece I promise comes straight from the heart

Poem Details | by Paloma P |
Categories: crazy, humorous, hyperbole,

elbbabohcysp

There's a place whence children dwell amid fairy stories, popcorn rainbows & candied unicorns, which is fine & dandy except when you're supposed to be a grown-*** adult, some people live 'round La-La landscapes without a hint of reality's woefulness, unable to read skywriting on the cosmos If you believe in miracles or that nothing ever changes and love lasts forever and a day or just say, you got a damn ticket because your unicorn was inconveniently double-parked, rest assured thine meter is delusional

Poem Details | by Lewis Raynes |
Categories: beautiful, beauty, desire, humor, humorous, love, society,

She loves jewellery

She has a collection, an unusual collection, 
Of four thousand and forty two,
Colourful, shapely, dangly rings, 
From green to gold to blue,

That she wears from ears, her nose, her lips, 
The ones that are on show,
And she wears a heap in other places, 
But there I will not go,

Her arms both glitter, her legs glisten, 
Her neck’s a twinkle on display,
She’s a shiny beautiful colourful star, 
When she walks throughout the day,

From hoops, to drops, to barbell hugs, 
She loves wearing tiny rocks,
But no one can actually see her now, 
She’s become a walking jewellery box.


Poem Details | by Francis J Grasso |
Categories: fun, humorous, love,

Love Me

Leave me alone you beautified 6itch ;
Oh ghastly and ghoulish playpen of a witch.
Vases of roses are covering your deeds;
Eloquent verses describe your sick needs. 

Many come calling but none ever leave; 
Even my dumb heart now wants a reprieve.


written 04.02.2016

Poem Details | by Gary Smith |
Categories: bird, humorous, language, pets,

Captain 'effing' Flint




My parrots name was Captain Flint,
Boy that bird could swear.
I never invited visitors,
So blue was the air.

He'd squawk "pretty effing polly"
Or "give us a cracker you t##t"
I'd never heard such swearing,
I never taught him that.

I bought him off a sailor
Who was heading back to sea,
He said to me, "you'll love him
He's such good company."

And what he said was right
He entertained, it's true.
I said "who's a pretty boy then"
He squawked, " well not effing you !"

The profanities just got too much,
I sold him, with regret.
But the house seems so quiet now, 
Without my 'effing' pet !

Poem Details | by Rhona McFerran |
Categories: food, humor, humorous, silly,

Cheesecake Nightmare

Love me or hate me
few people can take me
plain, unadulterated, true to myself
their compulsive need to gussy me up
or completely disguise me
gives me nightmares...
Horrible- horrible!

The worst is where
they try to make me
Savory.

Suffocated in sauces, sweet relish
and pickled beets
garnished with green olives
and fussy-cut vienna sausages
all dancing in fancy chorus lines
on top of me
Oh No! I can't take it...
It just can't be!

What are they thinking?!

I awake with a snug sensation
as something warmish
drapes and
drizzles
down my back
AAAAAHHH!
Caramel sauce-
Thank God!

Poem Details | by Nina Parmenter |
Categories: fun, funny, horse, humor, humorous, poets,

The Pompous Poet

“O to dwell in the past!” yearned the poet. “How nice!”
“The words of today are so coarse!”
So he wallowed in syphilis, sadness and lice,
Wrote a sonnet, then married his horse. 

He sat with dear Dobbin ‘neath shimm’ring skies,
as they supped on warm ale and hard cheese,
crying “Yonder, the moon shineth o’er the rise!”
“Pray my love, fetch my quill if ye please.”

Deep into the gloaming the poet didst muse,
as the horse she fell weary and bitter,
He cried “Tarry! Thine face is the bounty I choose!”
Dobbin smiled, and then trolled him on Twitter. 



11 May 2019



Poem Details | by Sunshine Smile |
Categories: angst, feelings, humorous,

- The Soup Cuckoo -




Jealousy is not the fear of losing
but the feeling that our position is threatened
As wet sand between your toes, unwanted

Sometimes jealousy turns into obsession
There are many wars, love your enemies ... never
We fight for love as a tender and small sparrow
Bitter taste, there is a fly in the soup











  17.01.2017
- Sun :) - A-L Andresen :)
  Copyright © All Rights Reserved

                 (\__/)
                (>'.'<)
                (")_(")

Poem Details | by Brenda Meier-Hans |
Categories: happy, humorous, love, silly,

Welcome to my Bio

Brenda Gail 
I am Compassionate, love and breathe poetry, humorous and a peace maker.
Sister of Patti Lynne, Paul, David and Beth.
I love children (more), I love to sing in a choir and have a song for just about everything. I love to make others happy.
I feel loved, appreciated and very blessed.
I fear not being healthy enough to make it to my son’s wedding, getting sick this winter and losing my mom.
I’d love to be able to travel again, walk around a mall, and would love to be in a poetry slam.
Living in the GTA Greater Toronto Area, Ontario.
Meier-Hans 

Written by Brenda Meier-Hans 
10.13.2014
Regina Riddles Contest: Bio Poems
1st

Poem Details | by Sunshine Smile |
Categories: emotions, humorous, kiss,

- Belissima : Amore -



I like a good conversation ~ about love and life
An objective opinion or a subjective opinion

Belissima ~ Amore
Age does not protect against love
Your sweet smile makes me melt

Yes, I'm incurably romantic
Sweet strawberries with cream vannlije

Belissima ~ Amore
In your eyes rushes my inner thoughts ~ intoxicating
Life is a dream ~ Your smile is like the stars in the sky

It is fate that decides
The important thing is not to find one ~ but finding the right one

Belissima ~ Amore
Your kiss is like drowning in soft chocolate
May I kiss you again









16.02.2017
Sun :) - A-L Andresen :)
Copyright © All Rights Reserved

Poem Details | by rob carmack |
Categories: animal, best friend, dog, humorous, love, pets, thanks,

Sonnet Chiweenie Boo

Your dad, a Dachshund once stuck in Chihuahua.
The best of both in you, with that expectant
Confusing carpets for the lawn enigma.
I know….the raining….getting wet….you can’t.

As coldness chills the room, a sheet for you.
The perfect tucking of in, but you moved!
I ponder, just how crazy is my Boo?
The sheet’s thread count too low to be approved?

Your dance in circles, spinning on the floor.
Rewards and treasures known upon the racks.
Induced by meals and that one pantry door.   
In such a fury, choking on the snacks.

I know what God’s book says, I’ve searched it whole.
But still, I hope you have a little soul.

11.14.14

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous,

RODGER AND HIS LODGER

There once was a young man called Rodger Who’s very transfixed with his todger From morning till night He gets his delight Now he shares his bed with his lodger The lodger her name was Sandy Was always ready and randy They’d make love all night But then they took fright When Rodgers legs went all bandy Submitted to New or Old 5 Contest Sponsored by Eve Roper 29 ~12~14

Poem Details | by Mark J. Halliday |
Categories: chocolate, holiday, humorous, religion, valentines day,

Valentine

Valentinius--
Not much is known about him,
But all girls love him.

Saint Valentine's Feast,
On February fourteenth:
Mostly chocolates!

It would make more sense
To honor Aphrodite...
So then, why don't we?!

Poem Details | by arthur vaso |
Categories: humorous, life, love, romance,

James Bond the Poet

Double oh Sevens
The gamble of dangerous men
Poets who carry guns
To shoot out the hearts
Of unsuspecting ladies
A single word, a bullet
That can wound or kill the love
Of any careless romance
Yet they fall at the feet
Of mystery and sweet words
And later in the evening
Tears flow from ladies of sadness
Left alone among the sheets of love
The Spy, he could save the world
Yet save not one single love
He grew old and alone
His last thought among the living
I die a lover, and never felt love

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous,

NIGHTIE NIGHT

I love my diaphanous nightie It’s sexy and sheer- its quite flighty But it’s a shocking disgrace Scant material and lace Cost hubby ninety-nine pounds ninety! 15th February 2015

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: dog, humorous,

AND THEY CALL IT PUPPY LOVE - FOR CONTEST

How could I not forgive you? Just one look at your puppy dog eyes Thaws the heart of this ice maiden Contest - Micropoetry ain't that tweet – Sponsor Casarah Nance (105 characters with spaces) 07~31~15

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous,

THE HIGH COST OF LOVE

Call me cynical Has anyone else noticed ……. All of a sudden The price of flowers and chocolates Rockets skywards high towards heaven Oh silly me its nearly Valentines Day! 12th February 2015

Poem Details | by arthur vaso |
Categories: angst, anxiety, art, friendship, humorous, imagery,

Friends

They love you
When you defend them
They run
When you need a helping hand

Real ones are there in total silence
Called the silent ones
To massage the pain
Inside
Of a wounded soul
They were there long ago
They are there now in the snow
Holding hands
Never letting go
Friends

Wiping tears
Striking fears
Praying for good cheer
Please me lord
Serve me one more beer