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Love Poems About Funny or Funny Love Poems

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Poem Details | by Daniel Turner |
Categories: funny love,

If I Were The One For Nicola

If only I could make my way to Paris
To search the boulevards and rainy rues
I'd look to find my lonely heart an heiress
An Irish lass vacationing her muse

We'd find a quiet cafe' on the Seine
Where we could sit and share a laugh or two
By candlelight we'd toast with French champagne
Pretend that we were on our honeymoon

But how could I convince her I'm the one
To make all of her fantasies come true
She knows there's more to life than having fun
In Paris hearts get easily confused

I'd get down on one knee under the stars
Give her the paper ring off my cigar



   an original poem by Daniel Turner
      



Poem Details | by Daniel Turner |
Categories: funny, love, sad,

How Long

I've never kissed a pig with my eyes closed
Nor have I ever held a hand of time
However, there was once when I proposed
But that was back when I was in my prime

I still recall how much she loved to dance
She'd laugh at me and make my face turn red
She taught me all the secrets of romance
That love was what one did, not what one said

I search the shadows for her purple hue
I take her mem'ry everywhere I go
Its smile has it's own special shade of blue
Its  taste so sweet no one could ever know

They tell me only time mends broken hearts
I wonder just how long before it starts.



   by Daniel Turner

Poem Details | by Maurice Yvonne |
Categories: funny, funny love,

I Hope This Gives You A Good Hearty Laugh



I thought it was kind of romantic
I wasn't being a fanatic
I pulled it out in the cold
You thought that was a bit bold
I wrote it in the snow about you and me
How much I love you I wrote it with my pee

I almost froze it off - it and my left ball
Then you hurt me when you said it was too small
It's like out of the pool
It follows the same rule
Not that I expected you to drool
But you didn't need to be cruel

Now I pull it out again and what I write
Your not going to like - it might cause a fight
Not just what it says about you that is quite biting
But the fact it was your sister who did the writing




Poem Details | by JSLambert Mister ROBOTO |
Categories: allegory, fantasy, father, funny, girlfriend-boyfriend, happiness, health, hope, husband, imagination, life, love, passion, people, places, romance, social, wife,

Viagra Falls

There once was a man from Niagara
whose wiener's so long it would stab ya'

but when it got little 
his pills became skittles   
until he O.D.'d on Viagra

© ~JSLambert  2011*****A classic "stiff" competitor, standing "firm" amongst other "members" in the "thick" of the competition:) hope everyone gets "a rise" out of it!


Poem Details | by Mary Nagy |
Categories: angst, daughter, family, funny, happiness, life, love, car,

Princess Needs A New Car

Princess just wants a new car.
I have told her that hers will go far.
'Oh, it's really not cool
driving this crap to school.'
'Do I need that emotional scar? '

'The kids will all laugh at the rust.
When we race, I'll be left in the dust! 
I will save up some cash
then we'll make a mad dash
to the car dealer surely you trust'.

'He will make us a wonderful deal
and I'm sure you will know how I feel.
I will love you so much, 
My siblings... I won't touch.
Just get me behind a new wheel'! 

Now she'll be cruisin in style.
She'll be happy for only awhile.
There will always be better
and we'll try hard to get her
a car that will make princess smile.

Poem Details | by Daniel Turner |
Categories: crush, funny love, humorous, teacher,

Teacher's Pet

As I look back, it all seems funny now
Recalling all those awkward teen age years
I pushed the limits farther than allowed
Supposedly when young, we had no fears

Infatuation caught me with the blues
My heart was swollen by love's gentle sting
It was a crush that only left a bruise
Left by the diamond in her wedding ring

The first day I laid eyes on her, I fell
The lightning bolt she was, that shook my world
And to this day I swear I'd know her smell
Could she have read my mind, she'd likely hurled

I hated school but never missed her class
She said she loved me 'cause I made her laugh


  original poem by Daniel Turner

Poem Details | by A.O. Taner |
Categories: august, beach, beautiful, cool, crush, deep, destiny, devotion, fantasy, feelings, first love, fishing, freedom, funny love, future, girlfriend, hope, i love you, i miss you, journey, joy, judgement, lost love, love, love hurts, meaningful, miracle, ocean, people, places, romance, sea, sensual, simple, spiritual, water, women, world,

Hope

Don't rush to wash off the sea salt 
drying on your skin;
the hopes it carries from other oceans,
those remain yet to be seen.

Poem Details | by Celeste Butler-Mendez |
Categories: funny, love

Black Magic Hearts

What underhanded monkey business 
razzle-dazzle bull is this? 
Whose double-crossing, flimflam scam, 
debauchery or hocus sham 
is wheeling dealing in romance, 
putting lovers in a trance? 

Antics, capers or witch's brew, 
enchanting hymns or shaman's stew, 
whose quackery or voodoo drink 
made Casanova stop and think 
and turned the ancient lovers cold; 
poor Romeo and nymphs of old? 

Perhaps black magic's potent gel, 
or craftiness or wicked spell, 
a clever con or master hoax, 
or just some trickster playing jokes. 
Whatever ruse that works the arts, 
mumbo jumbo seduces hearts!

Poem Details | by Dan Kearley |
Categories: funny, inspirational, love,

A Gentle Kiss

A gentle kiss, that I really must send To another true, and very dear friend Pucker up babe, it's coming your way And riding a storm, so it should be there today I licked my lips before I blew, so I know it's going to stick But with all the lightning, it might have a little kick So when it hits your lips, it might give off a little spark Now what started off as a gentle kiss, might be leaving you in the dark
*For my sweety* *Elizabeth Wesley* Love,Dannyboy 8-24-12

Poem Details | by Teppo Gren |
Categories: cute love, funny,

CUPID NAMED LYLE

CUPID NAMED LYLE

There once was a young Cupid named Lyle
who always aimed his arrow with style
with one shot straight as a dart
he hit me and pierced my heart
Aimed for a girl: he missed by a mile.


T.J Grén

6th April, 2016

Inspired by poets who write in many different forms, I've had a go at writing my first ever limerick, which is totally out of my comfort zone.

Poem Details | by arthur vaso |
Categories: fantasy, fun, funny, holiday, humorous, love,

I Want Peace

I want a piece of chocolate cake
Oh and a delicious piece of cherry pie
I want a piece of that place called Fort Knox
With all those pieces I could afford a lot

I want a piece of that lady over there
In her haute couture she saunters with such flair
I want a piece of the clouds in the sky
I just want it, don't ask me why!

I want some tiny peace of mind
To have some pieces left to be kind
Then I can give you a piece of  Art
A piece I promise comes straight from the heart

Poem Details | by MoonBee Canady |
Categories: daughter, family, funny, happiness, life, love, mother, nature, nostalgia, peace, people, seasons

Its Raining...

                          Its Raining…

God’s Cleansing Tool
Cloud-Concerto… How Cool !
Plop-Plop Plopping into Pothole Pools
On the Grass, Pavements and On My Own-Sweet- Fools…

who, don’t have Sense enough, to get out of the Rain…
… I think I’ll go Join Them… Again

                               Amen

Poem Details | by Anya Chebukina |
Categories: funny, love,

Basements Basements

This is just for fun..=)




In the basement of my heart
there is a basement
and in that basement there are two basements. 

You open one
and enter the basement 
only to find out there is yet another basement

That basements basement 
was light and blue
But that basements basement
was black

from basement to basement you walked 
until you couldn't anymore

The basements basements 
basements basements basements 
basements basements basements basement
of my heart.

You found my love...

Poem Details | by SKAT A |
Categories: adventure, brother, fantasy, funny, funny love, giggle, girlfriend,

Monkey See

Monkey See~

There once was a monkey named Frank
Who loved to walk the plank
He said too many jokes
Pulled too many hoaxe-s 
Ha! Ha! Ha! Then he got a good spank

*

Who's that monkey in front of me
I dare to hang with you on a tree
Oh! What I do? Will you do?
Together we are like glue
Is that my flea or your flea?

~ Skat ~

Contest~


Poem Details | by Sharon De Fazio |
Categories: cute love, funny love, i miss you, joy, love, simile, teen,

I miss you

I miss you, 
like the sky misses the stars.
like the streets when there are no cars.
like a government that has no laws,
like music, when it is on pause.

I miss you,
like the desert misses the rain
like an addict without cocaine, 
like a kiss that misses lips
like actors without their scripts.

Poem Details | by Laura Hannan |
Categories: funny, girlfriend-boyfriend, love, parody, passion, teen,

A Brutally Honest Valentine's

My darling enigma, my dove   
You’re the epitome of my love
Your smile shines at me pearly white      
Pale skin shines and glints in the light       
Silken locks, obsidian flow
Eyes just like ice, crystalline glow        
Peals of laughter ring like a bell            
Enchant me; I’m under your spell    
You walk with a musical flow
Tiptoeing with softness through snow

But, alas, you open your mouth
Utter tripe spilling out
If only you’d keep your mouth shut.

(Love from Anonymous) 

Poem Details | by John Henry Galas |
Categories: beauty, body, cute love, for her, funny, i love you, princess,

You Are Beautiful

I don't care if you are inaccurate.
I don't care if you're a tomboy.
I don't care if you're an oval or a circle.
I don't care where you come from or what you were.
I don't even care if you have a coconut cream pie-in-the-face.
You are good.
You are perfect.
You are a princess.
And I will always love you.
Like you should love yourself.

Poem Details | by Flippant She-Creature |
Categories: funny, girlfriend-boyfriend, happiness, health, lost love, love, mother, parody, romance, satire, sorry,

Shall I Compare Thee to Your Mother's ****

Shall I compare thee to your mother's ****?
Thou aren’t more lovely, but more flatulent.
Rough winds do shake it; and bring on a farce
And all her clothes hath all too short a rent

Sometime too hot-headed of hell doth burn,
And often is the true nature exposed;
And every foul from fowl; my stomach churns,
By reason, or by nature's raging closed.

But thy infernal diet shall ne’er start
Nor gain possession of which now I grasp;
Nor shall we meet again; let’s stay apart,
When in eternal sounds the voice does rasp,
So long as men can breathe or eyes can cry,
So long lives this, and I bid thee goodbye.

Poem Details | by Jerry T Curtis |
Categories: funny love,

My Best Pick Up Line

"I can tell you are a Libra"

"No !"  

"I am seldom ever wrong
Ah, of course you are a Taurus" 

"No!"

"But the feeling was so strong
Now it hits me, you're a Leo
I should have recognized the traits

"No!"

"Just please give me a moment
In my mind, I see a date

"You're a Pisces now ascending
With the cusp of Capricorn
And Scorpio was setting on the day
that you were born 
The moon was in Virgo
With Aries on the rise
and before you say, 
'No' again
Just let me say, 
"I love your eyes "

Poem Details | by Timothy Hicks |
Categories: addiction, funny, nonsense, simple, word play, words, writing,

I Have a Love Affair With Parenthesis

(don't tell anyone)

Poem Details | by James Fraser |
Categories: fun, funny love, giggle, humor, people, silly, tree,

Out Pops - a collab with Olive Eloisa Guillermo

Two poets who couldn't agree Raise their voices to their loud pleas One wasn't able to stop His zip open, out pops! Haha, it's a pea, not the size of a tree ©J. A. Fraser and O. E. Guillermo 15.18pm, April 07, 2015

Poem Details | by Andrea Dietrich |
Categories: childhood, funny,

My Poor Stinky Love

Oh, how I loved my little teddy bear
although I don’t recall from whom he came
or when I first laid eyes on him or where;
I only know I chose for him his name.

Yes, Pinky Winky’s name was like my own,
a playful silly nickname “Andy Pandy,”
and also in his ear a bell was sewn;
I jingled him and thought he was quite dandy.

Everywhere with me went Pinky Winky
until he met sad fate with one cruel splash.
He fell into the toilet and got stinky.
I wailed when Mother threw him in the trash.

Alas! The pink imposter in his place
no jingling made nor had dear “Winky’s” face.



-dedicated to PD

Poem Details | by Mark Pringle |
Categories: allegory, funny, lost love, heart, heart,

Once Upon a Happenstance

Once upon a happenstance
I gazed, a look, and paused in trance

To dream upon a crystal palace
Her heart aglee and form to chalice

With towers true and field in view
I set a course to give tongue to

I crossed the field - anxiety smote
And walked upon this palace mote

Yet, as I firmed, my heart to pour
She drew the bridge and bolted door

Poem Details | by niketa mckenzie |
Categories: funny, lost love, love,

One Night Stand

Their once was a girl in love
She knew he was sent from above
They danced, they sing they did everthing
But then he deflated in the tub

Poem Details | by Richard Lamoureux |
Categories: cute love, funny, longing, sexy,

Mama warned her

She expected very little from the guy
  A lesson she had learned long ago
     Guys are after just one thing
             It always started
               With just one
                     Kiss
               Then look out
          For wandering hands
      He would unbutton her top
  Then next he would remove her brasier
She was so excited...she could hardly wait !


Non Rhyming version of Andrea's new form.