Today Not Tomorrow
I have been untrue
To myself and to my heart
I waited for the questions to answer themselves
I waited for the possible to become probable
I cowered down behind shadows
Even they shied away
I cowered down behind lies
Even they unravelled
I cowered down behind those cowards
Even they left in disgust
Beneath the slime and muck of time
I lie shivering in the cold
Today I have said I, but never you
Selfish is the soul that speaks
To itself as it leaks
Lies and deceit upon the shelves
Shelves covered with hearts in jars
These hearts that cry out the truth
Their own echo is all they hear
I avoided the truth
I avoided confrontation
Today I opened a door
Only to shut another
Time is a whore
Time is the whore we all know
The whore that stole it all
Bottle up a heart in a jar
She will reopen it some day
As she has reopened secrets
As she has stolen them back
As she has taken my ego
As she has taken my confidence
Today I wait
As I have waited before
A day passes as time laughs
As shadows scurry
As lies fall apart
As cowards roar
As time cleans out
I shiver more
My love to you is ebbing
A wait after another
I question my wait, how I rot in this seat
I question my wait as I hide behind deceit
And yet I thank you
For on this day I know
I have wasted away before your gaze
And your recognition is yet awaited
Today I watch you get stolen away
And hope for time to repeat
For if only a second before I could have reached for you
But now I wait
To wait again
I am selfish
I have watched
I have gazed
I have dreamt
I have wondered
I have left you there in that dark alley awaiting my arrival
And I say
If only this seat had wheels
If only this dreamer had heart
Now I wait, for the moment I will rise
And I wait
For the moment you shall beckon
I shall cast my shadow upon the steps
I shall shed my skin of lies
I shall roar with vigor from within the cowering forms of many
And time shall stare with awe
Wings I shall grow
And together we shall soar
Through days and nights we shall dance
As time bleeds its envious blood
Today I ask for you at my side
Tomorrow I shall be there at yours
This selfish capsule of a soulless trap
Shall be a soul once more
With all those forms casting shadows
Soaring above the clouds of dreamers
Paired off, laying on the moon
Howling for the world to hear
Today not tomorrow
I shall be true
© Samir Georges
2005
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