Impotency
This poem is written with a fair of Jamaican Patois but I hope you all get the drift.
Cow Cock Soup
Boy things a get bad, really sad.
Went to bed last night
Mi wife feeling fruity
Mi eyes get bright
Put on her nightie
And gave me the invite
She sey come in the boudoir
But for god sake, get it right!
Her patience is running out
Something not right
For something which is now horizontal
Should be moving upright.
Yellow card she already issue
And whistle she no want to blow
But its time mi move from centre circle
And shoot for goal.
She a run out of patience
And cant stand the sight
Of that big black thing
Whey no want to stand up and fight.
Mi head start hot mi
Cold sweat start wash mi
It may rise to the task
But how long will it last?
She sey this is last caution
But she going on holiday
And if things no improve
When she gets back
She going to move out
Same Day!!
You no suffer from arthritis
Gone pass mid-life crisis
So if a so things a go stay
Better if we go our separate way
You no have money worries
She no longer need precaution
She don't know why it deflate
When her bun is in the oven
And she want it staked
Worse when there is bushes in her garden
And she want it raked
So mi siddung and hatch a plot
What to do with this darn blasted flop
Mi love my wife and want her happy
So when she go on holiday
Mi ago call somebody
And seek some consultations
From the bushman and the deacon
But mi skip the pastor
Mi no want his helping hand
But since she gone
Let me tell you wha a gwaan
Met a lady who tell me about a cure
Which should ease my complex
And get things back
Where they were before
So be at ease and fret no more
To remedy my anxiety and fix my droop
It comes in the drinking of
Cow Cock Soup
She advised me to drink it in the morning
Before its hot
And another cup an hour
Before she gets back
Drink it cold, then lay on my back
Slap her on the derrière
Then lift her frock
It would also help
If you stroke her back!
If that doesn't work
And do the trick
There is nothing else to recommend
But a candle stick
As soon as she got in
Mi follow her instruction
Lifted her frock
Slapped her derriere
Then stroked her back
Then came this sudden stand at attention
Lawd, didn't it work
From a reluctant member
To one which didn't shirk
Well after the act
I didn't have to ask
Because in the throes of passion
She cracked a laugh.
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