Deluded
I asked my daughter if she's happy that I'm gone,
her reply was "I'm sad daddy", her face, a picture not to be drawn.
How do I reply to something like that?
Torn between the one I love and my self created combat.
Are you really at peace without me?
like I can't even talk to you, feeling the third degree.
I don't have it together so please don't assume,
waking up every morning feeling impending doom.
Reaching a critical point in my life where I wanted to end it all,
I cried for help, the reaction from the one I love, I can always recall.
The whole thing thought to get attention,
adding to my frightening tension.
A deluded idea spawned,
the failure of commitment dawned.
Surrounded by drug addicts, alcoholics and the major depressed,
after seeing such things, I realized that I am blessed.
Would you be happier if suicide was my answer?
Or are you satisfied I'm alive with my soul suffering cancer?
A anguish that I truly feel can be cured,
from the love you once had for me, a love that seemed to endure.
|