Cruel Intentions
at times when it all sets
and sleep creeps in
I lie faced down into the pillow
wondering why I ever
became so naive
and let you go so deep
beyond skins touching
down below where the palms
of my soul lie, naked
why I ever blinked
each time you exhaled
poison down my throat
each time you tongue quest beyond mine
And I get to ask my self
how I'm ever going
to tell the one man
I ever so loved
that I know Adam
he has had juices of my fruit
and crushed my heart thereafter
shattered every little bit
ground them into powder
fine glass powder
and had me swallow them
waited til it ate out all my insides
How do I breathe
when the only chance I ever got
away from Goliath
means having his shadow
follow me around
why did I ever think
your eyes are the only
honest thing about you
I should have known your soul resides
on the roots of the hair
that you shave til your head
mirrors the mockery
of every word you ever muttered to me
even in my sleep
I still ask the creator
How it ever happened
that the dark blinded me
How it happened that transparent as you are
I could never see through
your teeth
and that stare you flashed each time
I questioned the thickness
of your blood
or its warmth
hell, if you were being enough
understanding the amount
of damage you have done
how many walls you have knocked down
and exposed me to the piercing cold
of June nights
unsheltered, unbathed, and unbated
I got me a tattoo that reads
"once bitten..."
and in between the words
is your face that I have stabbed
so hard with knives
sharpened at both ends
ha! Blood never gave me a fever
so my conflict with your veins
will be over in a jiffy
I will empty them
until u can lie no more
so goddamn hard your blood
will whiten
and your thoughts
will be a tad bit sincere than your intentions
because I love you
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