Love Poem: Split Personalities Love and Hate
Amanda Kinzer Avatar
Written by: Amanda Kinzer

Split Personalities Love and Hate

Your personality is split right down the middle in the way that is my heart, you should know all about this though, you played your part
You’re the reason I’m here now, living in this pain, and questioning with all that I have in me was I to blame?
See I must realize that you are not whom you once perceived to be, because the person then that once loved me, he could never have done this to me
That person was full of life and thankful, warm, and true, that person conveyed his emotions and did all that he could do to show me they were true

This person that I see now standing here in front of me, he wears your face as a disguise, but he isn’t the you that I once believed
He talks just like you and his mannerisms are the same, but there is something off with him I just can’t put to it a name
See the one that I loved, the one that I thought I knew, he would never be here looking through me, he would be pulling me into his arms and proving his love was true
This person I see now he is as cold as a winter’s day, and he stands there immobilized with nothing at all to say

See I am in love with someone that in his mind is someone else, he once showed me heaven but then he chose to put me through hell
What happened to you? What broke your tortured mind? Why couldn’t I see back then that you were not the person I thought you were inside?
The one side of you I call him Love, he was oh so sweet, and the beautiful words that he whispered into my ear made me feel complete
His kisses, his touch, the way that he would gaze into my eyes, the way that he opened up to me, and showed me there was no disguise

But therein I was fooled I guess that you could say, because the person that I thought you were is not who I know today
Someone has taken over and they reside within your soul, you handed over all your power, your thoughts and dreams, your control
Maybe you finally broke and to cope this was the only way, to hand over your life to another that would be apathetic, because it was just easier that way
That way you wouldn’t have to think, you wouldn’t have to feel, you wouldn’t have to choose, or no longer deal

You could just lie back and enjoy the ride within, and watch through those eyes that I once loved so much, but I will never witness the happiness shining through them again
All because you couldn’t take it, you couldn’t withstand the pain, so you let go of what you loved the most instead of driving yourself insane
But what about me? I didn’t get that choice; I can’t just turn off my emotions and walk around as though you’re not what I crave the most
I can’t lie to myself and pretend that I don’t care, I don’t have that option you see, I have to live in my despair

I must carry around not only my broken dreams, but also my broken heart, while you get to start a new life because you chose to bury your scars
You let go of the memories, the time that we once shared, and you gave them away to someone that feels nothing, and for no one does he care
I call him Hate and soon you will find out why, because no matter how many times I have reached out crying for you, he turns away and denies
Denies that he even knows me, that he has ever seen my face, to him I am just a stranger as he walks away without a trace

And I stand there in my puddle of tears and silently scream why, what did you do to the man I once loved with all of me? I can’t get him back no matter what I try
I know that he is buried deep within the cold-hearted statue that is now a vision of you, and all the while in my heart I know there is nothing that I can do
I can’t help you; I can’t break down the walls that you have built around your mind, I can’t beg for you to come back out, believe me I have tried
I can’t reach within your heart or gently touch your sweet face; I can’t make you see all that you were to me as much as I want to take your place

See I can’t stand to see you this way, so broken, so apathetic and cold, that just isn’t the you I knew, and it chills me to my bones
Because I know your heart, I know the pain, I know the tears that you have shed, I have witnessed the crumbling of the walls around your heart before and I want to see it again
I have brought you back from the depths, from the end of your line, I have held you in my arms, and I have made your pain mine
I have loved you so deeply, so truly, so whole, and I thought that was enough to save you from the darkness that has now invaded your mind and soul

I guess that I was wrong though, you can only save yourself, but you choose to let go of the struggle and stop the battle within and leave me to myself
I know that if I saved you then I can surely save me, but the painful truth in this predicament is that I can’t let you go, you’re a part of me
But I am just in love with a person that is split in two, he is the person I love the most, but at the same time, a person I never knew
You’re split down the middle with your personality and your heart, your mind is saying one thing to you and your heart plays another part

I can’t tell you what to do, I can’t tell you how to win, all that I can do is be here for you when it all comes to an end
I pray that one day you will wake up and grow tired of living this lie, that you will reach out to me again, hopefully in this life
I do love you, even the other half that doesn’t feel, because he’s wearing the disguise of the one, I love, and I know that you can still hear
Hear my hearts cries, hear my hearts calls, there isn’t anything that I wouldn’t do for you, not ever, not any day, I would give to you my all.