Love Poem: Reflecting the Brake From Back In the Day
Nick Trim Avatar
Written by: Nick Trim

Reflecting the Brake From Back In the Day

Let bygones be bygones though bygones bite on
Blessed to have had good times it’s life it went wrong
though it hurts good memories
to the end they’ll always be 
my friends and never enemies 
mean the most I’ve ever meet

Maybe I had to blank it out cus moving on ain’t easy 
for along while comatose mind stumped and sleepy 
recently awoken confused but as thoughts now free
and clear my clear thought is I didn’t think clearly

In hindsight I see the weed held me in checkmate
couldn’t steer perspective from collision course and failed brakes
concussed confusion finds ease pointing blame at mates
messed up not perfect life doesn't offer two takes

conclusions have me doubting 
when back then thoughts collapsed in
stopping short of the end 
so now on these I can't depend

It’s scary when you can’t work it out 
all’s unknown a fear constant doubt 
trust none want alone mind drought 
drained yet in the drain you drown

leaves you free of will and urges
no thought of do I deserve this
painless switched off ignorant bliss
simply forgotten by the mind it is

however over time the avoidance starts too rumble
with it layers of your very being shatter crack and crumble
earthquakes on the ground surrounding this bunker tunnel 
you choose to be cocooned in as life's too much trouble

playing a game but not accepting cards dealt
refusal to play runs down your health
physically present mentally in stealth
unable to configure controls for yourself 

refusal to pursue chokes you rotten 
 what complicated find's complications
chucked in waste no place for them
good times have a place for them

I've been up and down many a time left and right
even went around travelled far and out of sight
thoughts I've had were dumb thoughts of bright
but have to carry on with pride
good times leave me warm inside

what unsorted now not thought off
I'm no longer stewing over you lot
there's never anyone else like you
truth is I miss all I do 
in the past I was blessed true
I confess I hate this mess too 
how it broke up and fell through 

but I'm so thankful it built in the first place
years of our lives in shared spaces
my faces now taken from those faces
but have to say this

thank you so much 
memories leave me touched
so much so they often crush 
broke clean let's never destruct 

maybe in time we'll meet back up
if need be I'm still here to back you up
if you show me you're in it for me
then indefinitely friends infinity we'll be