Love Poem: Puzzle Man
Earl Schumacker Avatar
Written by: Earl Schumacker

Puzzle Man

Puzzle Man

Sex is sex with connections
According to “them”, chemistry plays a part
There are a lot of ins and outs, ups and downs with coitus
It has been suggested certain parts are needed for functionality
Utilization of external & internal parts might be required
Facts of life in accordance with birds and bees philosophy

“They” say it’s all about relations, (perhaps aided by vibrators or vibrations)
There are 3 kinds of sex;
1.)	Playing by oneself with one self
2.)	Sex between 2 persons
3.)	Orgies? Or morgies? Or mortgages?  (ménage a trios might fit this 
category) 
I’m confused about mortgages and it does not sound like fun
Then there’s sex with animals but that’s just wrong    
  
Commitment plays another part, free will with honor, monogamy
Other people pay for it. (Don’t get lost. Stay focused.  We’re talking sex.)
                      A business transaction, that comes with or without diseases

Trying not to be litigious
“They” also say other things regarding human beings and sex
Compatibility, social, economic, religious components weigh in

All is well with puzzle man….if he has a home, a job, a car
The car, as far as we know, always trumps a bike when dating
Competition is healthy in relations “they” say 

Parties involved in coitus know
Sex doesn't happen on its own
One must be properly lubricated and maintained 
Like an auto or chu chu train
I imagine it must be like a banana penetrating a donut
Not a savory sight
Again…. You need a home, or shopping cart, or car
Even up in a tree will do if you’re in the mood
To be accomplished
Reading books on what parts fit with other parts is desirable
They say the most important thing about such things is love
I wouldn't know about such things
It’s all a puzzle to a little man like me 
I only have a bicycle you see so sex is out of the question
Also, I’m only 3
Mother is about to bathe me
She had better keep her hands to herself
I want to figure these things out alone and by myself