Politically Correct Love Poem In a Litigious Society
Come live with me and be my love,
Lover status is open to all sexual persuasions in accordance with the liberties extended to the
Gay, Lesbian and Bi-sexual league. Living together as my love will result in common law
marriage status following five years of cohabitation. The common law marriage status will
extend to any Gay, Lesbian or bi-sexual lover in states that provide for such equality.
And we will all the pleasures prove,
Pleasures will be limited to legally accepted acts condoned by the state and federal
legislatures at the time the acts of pleasure are committed. Pleasurable acts will not include
participation of minors or beasts of burden. All pleasurable acts must be entered into with
the express written consent of both parties acting in the pleasure.
And we will sit upon the rocks,
Given that said rock agrees to be sat upon. Lovers sitting upon said rock will be responsible
for repairing any damage or defacement of the rock except for any damage that occurs
through force majure or coincidental acts of God not caused by the sitting lovers.
And gaze upon the valleys.
Except for those valleys that are deemed the private property of the valley owner or its
designated lessee. Voyeurism upon individuals living in or visiting the valley upon which we
gaze is strictly prohibited.
I shall make thee a gown of the finest wool,
Wool is intended to include any material derived from sheep, llama, goat or any other such
wool-like producing mammal and will only be made by licensed gown makers. No animals
shall be harmed in the gathering of said wool and no child labor will be utilized in the gown
making process.
And forever our love shall last.
Should the love be terminated prior to forever, the parties will equally split the value of the
rock, valley (except those valleys owned by others) and gown of wool. The love may be
terminated, without cause, by either party, with a 60 day written notice to the other party.
Should the love be terminated with cause, the other party has 60 days to remedy the cause
prior to termination. The party harmed by the cause may or may not accept the remedies
and may continue or discontinue the love as they deem practical.
This Love Poem is the property of the author. Any use or reproduction of this poem without
the express written consent of the author is strictly prohibited. All rights reserved.
Copyright 2010.
Entry in the Parody contest
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