Jenny Coal
I couldn't be much happier than the day you left me
I can go back to being miserable and lonely
It is much more enjoyable doing this by myself
No more stomach ulcers, you leaving me has improved my health
Since you've been gone, I've changed my point of view
It's all about me, it will never again be about you
With you I felt I was always on trial for some kind of crime
You had me sporting a ball and chain doing time
You were the Warden and I was on cell block 7
I was trapped in your hell, never seeing the light of heaven
Then a hurricane west wind swept in
It was a west wind named Jim
That day you told me to pack sand
I walked out to the car waiting for you and shook Jim's hand
I thank you Jim for freeing me at last
She will turn your world upside down and shatter all glass
I advise you to drop her off, don't let her slither in your life
She is worse than the Devil himself, don't make her your wife
Then one day, much later in the years
A knock on the door, it was Jim, you can tell he had too many beers
He ask to come in and says he can't stay long
He said he came home from work one day and made her gone
He looks at me with a smile from ear to ear
No more ulcers, migraines and no more tears
She left my life in shambles, but I am rid of her
From this day forward, I can start all over
I've already notified her next of kin
She got what she deserved in the end
She's in a million pieces, we got our wish
Scattered all over the Atlantic, feeding the fish
I tell him she as evil as they come, you will be visited by her ghost
I go to the kitchen and pull out a couple 24's and say let's have a toast
Let's drink to the woman who had no soul
No other man will ever have to experience Jenny Coal
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