If You Plan On Falling In Love With Me
If you plan on falling in love with me, get ready to know more than what is required about my favorite musical, get ready to receive obnoxiously customised gifts on your birthday, get ready for all the rants I have stored in my bag ready to be unleashed, get ready for spontaneous sushi dates.
If you plan on falling in love with me, there are some things that you should know. I will try to make your day even if my day is being compromised. I will be there, a call away but I might not pick up the phone. I will be there for you, some km away but I might not travel that much to meet you. I will be there for you always but I can't promise anything. You see, I am a person, a person whose person has anxiety and that anxiety doesn't let me be the person that I want to be. So, I will be there for you but I might not be there.
If you plan on falling in love with me, I want you to know that I will take you to art galleries, poetry fests and a million trips to my favorite corner of the city. I will bore you with the same song that I listen to over and over, I will make you savory pancakes and will stare at you while you eat them. I will write you letters, send you emails, serenade you with sonnets filled with anecdotes and I might ask you to write one to me too.
If you plan on falling in love with me, there are a few things you must know. I will cry for days, I will scream my gut out, I will not speak for days, I will probably cut you off for a few days. I will call you and won't say a word in hopes that you won't say anything either. You see, I really love this silence between us, the silence which we know is not awkward at all, this silence which we can read and comprehend in ways no words can.
So, If you plan on falling in love with me, I want you to know that even if I will, occasionally, act in a certain way that you might not be accustomed to and will try to shut you out of my life more often than not, I promise to try to make each day we are together, different from the previous one. I promise to love you and love myself in the process. I promise to try to make you a part of this path-breaking process of understanding myself. I promise to trust you with my darkest secrets, my over-ambitious plans, share half of the load that you are carrying, the only half that I can take. I promise to promise you all the things that I want to promise but If you do plan on falling in love with me, I can't promise that I'll keep them.
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