Love Poem: If Only
Karissa Kelley Avatar
Written by: Karissa Kelley

If Only

If only it didn't just take a second to get to heaven
The devil's smiling, bet he didn't tell you it's the fast track to hell
My smile's only temporary, but so is this life sentence I've been given
I never was asked if I wanted to start living.

So I'm..
Hanging by a thread
My sanity is laughing at me
In the mirror, staring at the person 
Who seems to be wandering
Empty and lost, like a penny on tails
Unlucky and left behind, story of a person
Such as mine.

My confusion is confused
Piece of mind tattered and loose
The love song from my heart, sings to the wind
Carrying on, I think it's never to end
Because it winds like the river
Occasionally winks and sparkles
Off a sunset reflection, searching for a tomorrow
But sometimes deep blue
Sad, like the pulsing veins
Of a heartbroken poet
Insane in the brain.
 
If only you could see me, then maybe.
If only you could save me, yeah then maybe.

Then maybe
Tears wouldn't run down the face and
Hurry away from the pain in the eyes
Of a person with nightmares
And teardrop filled skies.

A person who dreams of a better tomorrow
But memories are the chains
Bearing back her heart 
And holding the jagged pieces together
From falling apart.

I'm lonely
Do you see my face?
I'm trying
To get a grip nowadays
Yeah you could help me
Get me out of this place
If only, yeah if only.

Hoping one day another
Will hear her song through the breeze
And linger back to the place 
Where she kneels hopelessly
Desired to be glued together
Band aid, or tacked
She just wants to become whole again
And never look back.
Wants to trampled by love
Stampeded to the beat
Of love and loyalty
Someone she can keep.

Her broken smile will reign
And she'll rip stanzas from her soul
Trickling toxic tragedies
Painting pictures in your eyes
Watch her sorrows like a movie
On replay in your mind.
 
Her theatre is her torture chamber
Lashing you down to your raw memories
Don't look around, don't hide
Don't let your mistakes trouble your mind
Your blood is flowing
And you've still got time
To change the future
Is to change your mind

Maybe, then maybe.
You could save me
After you save yourself
Then you could help me
I've got nobody else, if only.

Yeah
If only.