Love Poem: Hmmmm -
Tim Ryerson Avatar
Written by: Tim Ryerson

Hmmmm -

I must admit I was stumped
My wife’s belly is bulging
and it continues to bulge
as each week passes by ...

Granted, I am NOT a doctor
although I portrayed one on TV
(Well, that’s not EXACTLY true, however
I DID watch numerous Dr. Kildare reruns)
Thus I offered my diagnosis:

“Peaches, it is merely a case of gas"
To which she replied “Kiss my peach!"
“And keep your grubby hands off it too!!"
At that point, I suspected the worse
She was hallucinating! To my knowledge, 
there is no peach orchard in our back yard
and she shuns buying fruit at the fruit stand
Could the gas, having nowhere else to go
penetrated her skull and invaded her brain?

I was convinced that my diagnosis was correct
This illness had accumulated for quite a while
She had refused my advances for 22 months
and later her ‘privates’ became a bit sore
Light bulb! It’s Elephantiasis....