Love Poem: Gallant Festivities
Carl Halling Avatar
Written by: Carl Halling

Gallant Festivities

It was my evening, that's
For sure - 
"Its your aura"
For sure - 
At last I'm good
At something.
"Spot the Equity card!"
"When are you going
To be a superstar?"
Said Sarah.
That seemed to be 
The question 
On everyone's lips. 
At last, at last, at last
I'm good at something.

And so the party...Zoe
Called me...I listened
To her problems;
References
To my innocent face.
Linda said:
"Sally seems elusive
But is in fact,
Accessible;
You're the opposite - 
You give to everyone
But are incapable
Of giving in particular."

Madeleine was comparing me
To June Miller;
Descriptions by Nin:
"She does not dare
To be herself..."
Everything I'd always
Wanted to be, I now am.
"...She lives
On the reflections
Of herself in the eyes
Of others...
There is no June
To grasp and know."

I kept getting up to dance
Sally said: "I'm afraid;
You're inscrutable;
You're not just
Blase
Are you?"
I spoke
Of the spells of calm,
And the hysterical
Reactions,
Psychic exhaustion, 
Then anxious elation.

"Gallant Festivities was based on two pages of informal journal notes dating from 1982-'83, although all names have been changed.)