Dear God...
Dear god, she prays, an unfamiliar sensation,
The words tripping clumsily off her tongue:
Dear God, I know I don’t talk to you as often as I should
And I know I sin like it’s going out of style,
But please,
Please, with icing sugar and bourbon on top,
Please don’t take this gift away –
Please don’t renege on this cushy deal,
This transcendental understanding that lies
Between your lofty lap and my roman nose;
Please don’t take my lover away…
This divine effigy of manliness and destructive beauty,
Please let him stay with me, as mine,
At least for a few years more;
Don’t smite him with your bolts from the blue,
Or slip him a tender dose of death in the witching hour;
Please don’t infect me with some outrageous affliction,
To drive him from my side
And please, oh please, don’t corrupt the fragile love that blooms,
Tenuous and oh so sacred, inside the walls of his generous heart
For it is this love that nourishes,
That sustains and rebuilds and redeems this, my condemned soul
He is all that stands between me and the gallows of hell
Without him I should be lost, cut adrift on a high tide
Of my own masochistic machinations
And, weeping, wailing, I would slowly drown,
My lungs filling with the residue of my broken heart
And the filth of nineteen years of dogged sadomasochism
Until, with a last lachrymose sigh, I would slip beneath the waters
Never to see him again, my fallen angel, my ashen deity,
My testament to true love…
Never to kiss his heaven-sent lips…or stroke his feather-down hair
Or spend another blissful night,
Tucked safe inside his arms…
|