I have a confession to make My lizard and I are deeply in love but she thinks I’m cheating on her and often puts a tail on me I’m wrapped up in another quandary My python has a crush on me and wants me to be her squeeze It’s a slippery slope I’m slithering down To be honest, she DOES take my breath away but if my lizard lover hears of this tawdry tail she Iguana be awful jealous, but frankly speaking I think she needs to scale down her expectations