Love Poem: body memory

body memory

this is not love
burning my soul to ashes...

this cannot be love
that made my heart scream
until its love fell off at the edge of life

i have waited for a full day
to tell on you to mama
to tell to tell to tell

of how you slipped
into me
whilst i was asleep

creating fear in my heart
with your fierce look at me
ordering me to shhh shhhh shhh shut up

my body carries
a violent memory
of you forcing entry into me
of you soaking my fragile skin
with your stinking sweat

and i know this’ and i know this

that when you imprisoned me in this painful memory
you also imprisoned yourself in guilt –

unless you are a psychopath, remorseless –