As Long As I Obey
My favourite bunch of flowers
with a loving little note,
he didn’t mean to hurt me
was the message that he wrote.
I know that he is sorry,
he tells me every day,
so a happy loving house wife
is the role I still convey.
No one knows our secret
or the shame I sometimes feel
and his sudden angry outburst’s
are what we keep concealed,
I tell my friends and neighbours
I had a clumsy fall
and cover up the damage
with a picture on the wall.
I know he really loves me,
he tells me every day,
“It’s no one else’s business,”
is what he’d always say.
If I ever tried to leave him,
he said he’d take his life,
“Until I take my dying breath,
you’ll always be my wife.”
It’s like treading over egg shells,
always careful what I say
but I know he really loves me,
he told me yesterday.
He starts out calm and peaceful
but I know the rage is near,
then a sudden storm of anger
consumes the house with fear.
A slave to rage and anger
is all that I’ve become,
I’ve been stripped of all my dignity
and emotionally I’m numb.
My thought are vague and scrambled,
fear and guilt are in control,
while anxious desperation
now has a strangle hold.
I know he really loves me,
as long as I obey
and the bruises I’ve been given
are the price I have to pay.
I’m petrified by just his stare
and it chills me to the core,
My stomach churns, my nerves are frayed,
I can’t take it anymore.
“I’ll love you until the day I die”
Is what he’d always say,
It doesn’t matter anymore,
I left him yesterday.
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