Love Poem: Another Couch
Nad Simon Avatar
Written by: Nad Simon

Another Couch

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How do I find myself here again
On a couch one more time
Another call that I should make
An irony sublime

We split a few weeks ago
A party I've been having
But She just called me so I'd know
What has been happening

Her request is oh so simple
But massive its import
A date to a business party
As boyfriend not escort

She has no reason to stay here
So She just told me now
If She cannot be here with me
Then back to Her home town

I am still young, I am coming 
Into my own it's true
Money, position, success at 
My doorstep and it's due

Do I share it, not keep it all
Discarding selfishness?
Or do I take the glutton's fall
With a villain's harshness?

Women I'll find so freely now
They've been just so for me
Coming quickly to my calls since
I reached maturity

But She's put me to the question
She's given the deadline
Will I be a real man for her
Or just the boyish kind

I've been put to this test before
I've realized I failed
Years' guffaws through gritted teeth
While inside my heart wailed

Then to visit the other One
This is to keep Her here
One relationship exhausted
This shortened by my fear

If I make this phone call to Her
It means the end of youth
It means real life consequences
It means upholding truth

It means we'll say our wedding vows
It means fidelity
It means that I must choose right now
Whom I will want to be

How did this ever happen here?
'Twas just some youthful fun
How did She in full time become
The one I call The One

Over moments and half a decade
She's all that I can see
Like my limbs, my mind, my soul
Becoming part of me

But am I really ready now?
Can I uphold all this?
Can I be all that She deserves
In Her last lifelong kiss?

Saw the other One weeks ago
I've never seen such hate
Pointed at me for things I did
A guilt I cannot sate

Am I a better man than then?
Even a little bit?
The One knows all the wrongs I did
And She's forgiven it

I have been honest and have been 
True more than I was not
But in the last year I often 
Betrayed Her loving thoughts

How did She oh so easily
Find forgiveness for me
Immediately letting love
Still uphold and shore me

I fear Her, and I fear all this
I fear the loss of youth
I fear vulnerability
In telling honest truth

But more than all of this I fear
Another great love lost
A treasured heart rent by me
Without regard to cost

I will always regret hurting
My other One so badly
For making her think that I did
Love her less than madly

And if She were to hate me like
The other One does now
It will make my mind break in two
And make my body bow

So like She lit those fires in me
That I thought were darkened
She now ignites my will and mind
As Her call is hearkened

The phone is ringing through the line
My fears have been put paid
For The One I'll make myself the
Best man I can be made

For to Her and the other One
A tribute I will give
Inspired by my two great loves
A good man's life I'll live